Monday, January 5, 2009

Empty Or Full

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I just love a cup of tea. Or coffee. Or hot cocoa. I love tea cups and coffee cups. I also love serving others . Especially when it comes to my children.  However, I have been feeling especially empty lately. Drained rather. The demands of motherhood have been taking over and I haven't felt that I have been flowing in my parenting. I have felt more like I have just been treading water trying to stay afloat. This is expected to some degree with a new baby in the house and the recent holidays. But I have felt extra drained. Maybe it's all catching up with me after months of running on adrenaline. I wasn't sure. Until recently when the Lord began to minister to me while I was up with one of the children in the wee hours of the morning. I recall saying something to the effect of "I'm exhausted". I wasn't talking to anyone. Just thinking out loud. The Lord responded. Right there in the middle of the night. Right there with a baby in my arms. He ministered. He spoke to me. Great wisdom. Great insight. He even brought correction. He told me to take out the tiny cups that the children use while brushing their teeth. There must have been 70 or 80 tiny cups. He told me to line them up on the bathroom floor. I did so. He then told me how each one of those cups represented a request that would be made of me that day times five. Each one represented a need, a want, a desire. Not just from my children- but from my husband, a friend and so on. A request could come without a moments notice. He told me how I would want to fill the need. He also shared with me how I could do so but that I would be doing so in my own strength which would always produce the same result. Exhaustion. He reminded me of how I hadn't spent much time with Him alone at the start of each day recently. He reminded me of how He is the One who fills me during that time so that I can then go out and fill all those tiny cups each day. He is the One who pours from the pot that never runs empty. Not me. How true. How can I possibly do it all apart from Him?
Quite simply- I can't. I repented for putting the children before Him. I repented for putting family and friends above Him. He was right. Beautifully right and I knew it. I have been so tired lately that I haven't started the day alone with Him. Since Thanksgiving this past year I haven't stopped. When Bennett was diagnosed with pneumonia again . All four of the children had one virus after another. Macey needed a dress custom made for her sorority initiation. Back and forth to the airport. Birthdays and Christmas planning. Birth announcements and Christmas cards. The never ending household chores. Each days tasks seemed to just multiply like mountains before my eyes. I have been a little overwhelmed.  I usually spend time with Him at nap time or late at night. But by then, I am already exhausted.  I think there is something so peaceful and so fulfilling about that quiet time early in the morning each day and it is so much easier to hear Him at that time.  By 1:00 in the afternoon each day I am already feeling the pressure. I can be easily distracted. The phone is usually ringing. The doorbell too. Cell phone is usually ringing as well. Someone may wake up early from their nap. Dinner needs to be started. I still need to clean up lunch dishes. The laundry is beeping. The list is endless. I could see clearly how at 5:00 a.m. none of this is going on yet. The birds aren't even awake at this time. My heart turned toward Him in a new way and for that I am so thankful. I don't have any New Year's resolutions except to sit with my empty cup and be filled in His presence at the beginning of each day this year.  May you find the same remarkable moment each morning to share your cup with Him and be filled in supernatural ways......

12 comments:

Steph and Aiden said...

great post!. I love your blog

Erica Kelly said...

gorgeous tea cups - i share that passion for drinks and hosting as well. God bless!

Unknown said...

Thank you for that post. I usually do my devotions with Him before bed, but sometimes I fall asleep in the middle of my final prayer. I will now try to have my time with Him early in the morning.

3 Peanuts said...

Oh how I wish I could come help you and give you some time. I felt this way a few months ago I really did! I do not have the demands hat you do. I am praying for you and I know the LORD will give you exactly what you need. you are a blessing to me and every one of your posts inspires me.

Kim

The 5 Bickies said...

You are so kind to share these thoughts with us while in the midst of so many demands on your time. Thank you for reminding us of the importance of prayer and time for reflection! I pray that your cup is filled!

Cherry Tea said...

I love, love, love your blog! Just wanted to tell you that!

nest of posies said...

where in the world should i begin this comment...???
first, i LOVE what the beauty shop did for pearls and grace. simply beautiful, and oh my goodness is it EVER YOU! just gorgeous darling!
second, my oh my. i do have the same thoughts as you in the middle of the night. some tired mommys we are. but, some how the mornings are always delightful to see their shining, smiling, faces. and to honor HIM who created them is such a good idea, in the morning! thank you.
love you.

nest of posies said...

P.S.
i just clicked on to "meet p & g" on the new facelift. beautiful letter. so very well written, as always. you know it will take me a while to comment on all of your new visual wonderland! with a baby in each arm. i am so happy for you & p&g.
she did an amazing job, and what a beautiful vision you had for p&g!

lizziefitz said...

OK. I get it. It makes so much sense when you put it that way. I make too many things in my life more complicated than they need to be.I'll save the drama for my mama and fill my cup with the Father. Thank you!

Amanda said...

lovely as always - love the new llok.

sugar said...

Thank you so much for sharing this. I have such a hard time waking each morning and then when I do I'm running around like crazy to get ready and every night I try to go to sleep early so that I can get up early and I can't fall asleep. I've got to make this a priority. I've been running on empty lately because I too have been trying to do it in my own strength. What a blessing to read this, it has really blessed me. I will pray for you, for so many years my life was about no sleep and tons of housework and taking care of my 4 little duckies. I now long for those days but am now trying to use it to help me appreciate today's challenges and todays lessons and what my life is about in this season. Thanks for reminding me I'm never alone and my weaknesses are perfected in Him.

Dawn Parsons Smith said...

Thank you for your beautiful pearls of wisdom! I love this post. I have no doubt I was divinely guided here. Your words filled my cup which I've let become empty. You are a treasure...a true pearl from God.

I am adding your button to my blog immediately:)

With abundant blessings,
dawn